Aamir or Salman, who is the villain of the Karan-Shah Rukh bromance?

Aamir or Salman, who is the villain of the Karan-Shah Rukh bromance?

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srk-karanAFPCNS

MumbaiBy Piyasree Dasgupta  August 23, 2014:-While Nitish-Lalu might be their newest competition, the only other set of people who could match Modi-Amit Shah in their Jai-Veeru quotient, are Shah Rukh Khan and Karan Johar.

Their bromance is so legendary that you wouldn't be even a bit surprised if they were found doing an anti-pimple facewash commercial together. Prior to the release of My Name is Khan, Karan Johar had said, "I can never make a film without Shahrukh." We believe him.  The phrase 'Kuch Kuch Hota Hai' has become the most iconic words on human affection in the history of Bollywood. Actually, it could well be the 'Et tu Brutus?' of Bollywood romance… err… bromance.

Shah Rukh Khan and Karan Johar. AFP.

However, like all great stories the Khan-Johar story, too needed a villain to proceed towards its logical Bollywood end.

In all possibilities, it has acquired one already. According to a report onNDTV, Shahrukh Khan has rejected a script that Karan Johar asked him to consider.

Mumbai must have sensed the catastrophe, which explains the renewed vigour of monsoonal rains in the city. While not much is known as to what transpired at the script reading session, here's who/what we think could be the villain in this generation's greatest ode to friendship, after Facebook.

1. Salman Khan: Now, it's hard to not befriend and then best friend Salman Khan. How can any human not secretly crush on anyone who speaks in mosquito language on social networking sites. And in a world in which people haul you up for not spelling properly, for wanting to jump queues at banks and send friend requests to unknown people on Facebook, Khan gives you a big thumbs up for just Being Human.

So no big surprise that Karan Johar was also taken in by this great virtue. So much so that not only did he kick off his last chapter of Koffee With Karan with him, he has now signed Salman Khan up for his next film Shuddhi which was famously rejected by Hrithik Roshan.

While it is clear that Johar was hunting for talented biceps to star in the film, of course Shah Rukh Khan has taken umbrage. What's a friend who judges your biceps and says they are not good enough? The script rejection then must be SRK avenging the reputation of his upper arms!

2. Aamir Khan: Okay, now Aamir Khan has always been the person to steal Shah Rukh Khan's thunder. Be it films, be it television Aamir Khan was solely responsible to showing Bollywood that there is an alternative to Shah Rukh Khan. He did to Shah Rukh what Candy Crush Saga did to Farmville.

Then Aamir reportedly decided to relieve his dog from living with the ignominy of being called Cuddles, Buttons or Fluffy and gave him a name every Bollywood buff is proud of – Shah Rukh. While SRK said he was okay with the Aamir calling his dog Shah Rukh, everyone knows the truth.

After all the atrocities Aamir has inflicted on Shah Rukh, how could best friend Karan then go and sign the latter up for a movie? While there is great business sense in doing that – given that Aamir Khan has now united sanskaari uncles, religious aunties, men who back body hair and women who like average-looking men with their pants on –  this is a clear breach of trust. No wonder Shah Rukh doesn't want to read Karan Johar's script.

3. Siddharth Malhotra: Because the man is dreadfully goodlooking. Because the man can just stand, blink, occasionally smile and look bored (that's also pretty much what he does) and people still flock to watch him. Imagine if he starts eating biscuits, trains a dog or hails a cab in a film convincingly – sheer hell will break loose for the Khans.

Not only did Karan Johar produce his first movie, he has now roped Malhotra in for a remake of Ram Lakshman and produced Hasee to Phasee. Chances are women will run to the theatres to watch him and men to watch and learn why they watch him.

Aamir has dropped his pants for PK, Shah Rukh has gotten a streak in the colour of sugarcane waste to look cool, and look at this boy, just standing their and stealing their women.

As an old friend Johar should have stood by Shah Rukh without letting the kids play too much, but obviously, he valued the box office more. What heartbreak!